Every girl likes to be told they’re beautiful. Not “hot,” not “sexy,” not “cute”… BEAUTIFUL. And I hate going through my day knowing you outwardly compliment your car more than you do me. It makes me feel like crap, to be honest. The more I joke around about it and bring it up, the more serious I am. Quit paying $10 every few days to wash your car… deal with the fact that the weather here sucks. If you want a spotless car, get a garage and keep it there under a tarp. Better yet, get a frickin’ vacuum-sealed room. I bet those audio store guys could build you one, and sound-proof it too.

Every girl likes to know her friends are there; all the time, no matter what. They shouldn’t need to come up with $300 every few months to be associated with other people who don’t give a rat’s hindparts about anyone but themselves. Letters only go so far; real sisterhood happens with or without them. The world could do without the lot of you, in my opinion… there is a lot of virtue in sacrificing yourself for the greater good, so long as you can see what that “greater good” is. (Read: Get your respective heads out of your respective asses and GET A CLUE.)

Every girl knows when she’s being bull-shitted. Quit trying. Delusional and denying reality, maybe… but outright stupid we are not. I would love nothing more than to have Julian Beever draw a bottomless pit in the middle of the road and PUSH YOU INTO IT! It’s the closest legal thing I can do to pushing you off a cliff, and waving while you flail to your doom.

  1. whoamitoday posted this